Isn’t sex supposed to be easy?

Am I just in the wrong relationship?

How do we get to the point where sex is fun again?

Am I broken? Is there any hope?


A how-to guide for couples to transform their sex lives!

Jessa Zimmerman takes on the heart-wrenching questions that naturally arise when couples are struggling with sex. Once sex becomes synonymous with disappointment, avoidance sets in and creates pressure in the bedroom. In this straightforward and practical book, Zimmerman guides us to understand the cycle that develops when sex is difficult, to shift our mindset when it comes to sexual intimacy, and to transform our sexual experience with our partner using a nine-phase experiential process.

Advance praise for Sex Without Stress

  • Whether being in a couple or working with couples, skill, perseverance and perspective are always important. Jessa Zimmerman, an expert in counseling couples, has written a much-needed book about couples. Her book is accessible and insightful. Her advice is never ‘formulaic’ but instead focuses on thoughtful and practical discussions about growing as a couple. I’ve wanted to refer to a book like this for a long time. So glad and not a moment too soon, Zimmerman has written it.  I give it my highest recommendation!

    Sallie Foley
    Sallie Foley Director, University of Michigan Sexual Health Certificate Program & Co-author, Sex Matters for Women
  • Jessa Zimmerman takes the reader through a straightforward and no-nonsense journey, highlighting the most common struggles couples experience. This book identifies the top issues with which couples struggle: from defining what sex is or should be, desire discrepancies and differences in couples’ sexual styles. She clearly maintains that it is essential for each partner to be accountable for themselves—and to each other—to follow the useful action steps she walks them through necessary to bypass avoidance, disappointment and pressure.

    Dr. Joe Kort
    Dr. Joe Kort LMSW, Author & Speaker
  • A definitive resource that helps couples face and identify the pain of lost sexual intimacy. Jessa bridges the gap between sexual desire and sexual despair as she offers concrete methods to stop avoiding sex. Her techniques clearly outline ways to have “sex without stress” that are accessible to all couples, regardless of gender or sexual orientation. As a sex therapist, I highly recommend this book as it pursues reducing the pressure and finding the pleasure of sex. 

    Edy Nathan MA
    Edy Nathan MA LCSWR, CST
  • Over the last 40 years, I have met many good couples struggling to become great, trying to recapture the passion they had when they first met. Sexual problems are common over a long-term relationship. Many couples avoid sharing their personal feelings about their sexuality, failing to address the personal barriers to recapturing that loving lust. Jessa Zimmerman’s book addresses just that, helping couples who avoid sex to find transparency and willingness to share and explore oneself and each other’s sexual map. Sex Without Stress can help your love life become great again.

    Dr. Kevin Seymour
    Dr. Kevin Seymour Clinical Psychologist
  • We need this book! Honest and straightforward guide for couples to help improve and deepen intimacy.  Rich resource to help people get “unstuck,” reflect on their believes and expectations, and gain tools to create change by putting insights into action with practical exercises and a clear plan. The book offers practical solutions and supportive framework guiding readers toward the future where the echoes of disappointment, avoidance, and pressure are transformed in to the relaxed, joyful, and fulfilling connection.

    Yulia Brockdorf
    Yulia Brockdorf Clinical Director, Nutrition for Success
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