Your Family History

Understanding your part of the avoidance cycle in your relationship means taking a close look at your family history. In order to change your relationship patters, you have to get clear about your contributions to the problem and where they stem from. Let’s turn first to your upbringing. As I mentioned in last week’s blog, […]

Who Packed Your Bags?

My last several blogs have dealt with how to begin a conversation with your partner about sexual difficulties in your relationship. If you and your partner have come to an agreement about improving things together, you can now move into the conversations that form what I call the “discovery” part of the process. If you […]

Make a request, but remain flexible

My last several blog posts have focused on how to make discussing relationship difficulties with your partner easier. I talked about how using “I” language and confronting yourself first can demonstrate to your partner that you are willing to take responsibility for your part of the work. Let’s turn now to another important skill when […]

Confront yourself first

In last week’s blog, I talked about how using “I” language can help improve communication with your partner. Doing so acknowledges to both of you that you take responsibility for your own feelings. Likewise, it is important to confront yourself first when discussing relationship difficulties. Start by facing yourself honestly. Admit your negative parts and […]